Dier Senor Gerente:
Now I am tella yu di story jau I was treated at yor jotel. I am comma from Galicia, Espanha as touris to London and estay as a young a man at yor jotel. When I comma my room I see is no shit in my bed. How can I sleep with no shit in my bed? I col down de recepshon and tella: "I wanna shit." Dey tella me "Go to the toillett"....I sey "no, no, I wanna shit in my bed" Dey sey "You betta not shit in yor bed, you sonnawabitch". What sonnawabitch? I dono undestand! I go down for restoran for breikfast. I order beicon and eggs and two pisses of toast, I getta only one piss of toast. I tella waitress and points of toast" I wanna piss" She tella me "Go to the toillett".... I say "No, No, I wanna piss on my plate" She den say to me "you bloddy fella not piss on yor plate, you sonnawabitch" Secon person who don even know me and col me sonnawabitch! Why sonnawabitch, why? Later I go dinner into restoran. Spoon and knife is der but no fock. I tella waitress" I wanna fock", and she tella me: Sure, everybody wanna fock" "I tella her" no, no, you don onderstand me. I wanna fock on de table." She den tella me "So you sonnawabitch, wanna fock on de table? "Get your ass out of here." So I go to de recepshon and ask for de bills. I no wanna stay in dis jotel no more. When I have pay de bills, the porter say to me "Thank you and peace on you." I say "piss on you too, you sonnawabitch" I go back to Galicia! I never more comma stay in your jotel, you sonnawabitch.
Sincirly
Venancio, cousing of Jose.